Tuesday, 10 January 2017

A Spiritual 2017

Hi Guys!

I just wanted to talk a little bit about what my main focus is going to be in 2017 and honestly I have been so excited to write this blog post as it makes this journey seem a little more real. This may be a super long post so get yourself a snack or a cup of tea!

Let me start from the beginning.

For as long as I can remember I have seen the world in such a negative light. I never appreciated the earth that we live on & although I was grateful for my friends and family it was rare that I found beauty in random strangers or anything else for that matter. I dwelled on the past and things that hurt me so much that I would always wonder when I would ever be able to move forward and there where even times when I was so depressed that I genuinely just didn't want to be alive anymore.

I found comfort in spending money such as going shopping, going out for dinner or to the cinema, things like that and I relied so much on other people to make me happy. I allowed so many negative people to have control over my happiness, I never truly dealt with my emotional issues and I never accepted things that had previously caused me unhappiness.

However, one thing I had always been attracted to which I find quite strange now looking back was Buddhas. For as long as I can remember I have always had a little collection of them and although I wasn't exactly sure why I just knew I was drawn to them in some way. 

For just over a year now I have had a deep desire to begin practising and exploring within spirituality and Buddhism but I was too afraid to tell anyone as it requires a lot of personality changes and I was worried that people would think I was faking it or doing it for attention or something along those lines so I kept it hidden. One thing I also worried about is that I grew up in a Catholic family and although they aren't super strict with it I knew telling them I wanted to break away from that would be a bit awkward.

Over the past few months I started reading books & watching YouTube videos on these topics and my mind was totally blown. When watching these people talk so passionately about spirituality, enlightenment, religions, etc. I felt like I had finally found people who I fully related and felt connected to. They made me realise that being my true self was the only thing that could truly bring me happiness and that hiding this only meant I damaged myself for others which is wrong. Anyone who truly loves you or deserves to be in your life will accept you for whoever you are and whatever you believe in.

I want to make a YouTube video on this as I don't want this post to be ridiculously long but I cannot express how much my life has changed since I began exploring the deeper parts of myself. I have been able to fully let go of things from my past that tormented me and I now see the world in a totally different (and beautiful) light. I want to live. I want to be happy and I want to share my happiness with others in any way that I can.

I definantly have a lot more exploring and learning to do on these topics and there certainly will be more blog posts about this kind of stuff as I go along but as of right now I can truly say that 2017 will be a year of self discovery and self improvement which I am beyond excited about.

What are you most excited for in 2017? Let me know below!

Thank you for reading,
Katie Ellen. xxx


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